Monday, July 09, 2007

Knee Day: The Date's Been Set

I will be having my knee reconstruction on August 23. It's my second ACL reconstruction so I know all about the pain I'm going to cop.

I'm particularly looking forward to:
  • Trying to convince the anesthetist that I don't require an epidural. I'm sure the last bloke gave me one without telling me and blame him for the ridiculous nerve injury I sustained, forcing my leg to twitch at night for the entire year post operation.
  • The wonderful frustration and eventual kidney-splittin' pain of not being able to go to the toilet for 36 hours after the operation. To counteract, I shall cease drinking fluids.... TOMORROW.
  • The incessant questions, the same questions damnammit!, about my medical history by the doctors, nurses, consultants, anesthetists, interns, students, cleaners, journalists, pigeon fanciers and beauticians. I'm going to print out a list of answers and laminate it.
  • Watching the Collingwood v Melbourne game in my hospital bed, the night after the operation. I will be groggy, in pain and struggling to stay awake. McAvaney, Commeti and Schwartz are that tedious.
  • The few weeks in bed after the operation. I hate that bit. Too much pain to read books and too groggy from the painkillers to watch DVD's. Yuck. At least I'll get out of there for the finals.
  • The nurse weeks later taking out the staples. He/she better not fuck up like the last lady. Instead of taking the last staple out, she pushed it further in there. Worse. Pain. Ever.
Fricken knee.


Glenn said...

I forgot about the huge Alan Marshall's I Can Jump Puddles style knee brace I'm going to have to wear for the month after the operation.

I shudder every time I hear the ripping sounds of Velcro.

Alison said...

Poor Chook - If I had the time I'd knit you something to bite down on.
Good luck, and God bless.

Glenn said...

Thanks Alison.

But really it won't be too bad and last reconstruction I was only immobile for about a week.

The pain I'm not looking forward to but there's something strangely interesting about the recovery and physio program afterwards.

Rehab is a project.

I like projects.

Nina said...

That's the day after my birthday! Mememememememememe!

Glenn said...

Great. I'll be fasting on your birthday. Better cancel that table at the Vege Bar then.