'It's Your Word Against Mine' Says Baseball Bat Scrabble Killer

From OddStuff New Zealand....

An argument during a game of scrabble led to the man being bashed at least 40 times with a baseball bat and stabbed five times in the back, a court has been told.

Brendon Tahau, 26, of Rotorua died after 10 violent minutes.

In the High Court at Rotorua a Rotorua pair admitted killing Mr Tahau. James Wharetakahia Hamiora, 22, unemployed, pleaded guilty to Mr Tahau's murder.

His associate Gabriel John Kingi, who turns 19 next week, pleaded guilty to manslaughter.

The court was told Mr Tahau had visited a friend on August 25 last year and they settled in for a night of scrabble.

Hamiora, Kingi and another man turned up at the house.

When Mr Tahau took exception to the way Hamiora was speaking to his friends, Hamiora held up a bullet and put a cigarette against it saying he was going to shoot a hole through the wall.

Mr Tahau told Hamiora not to disrespect his friend's house and the pair argued.

Hamiora got a silver aluminium baseball bat from his car and began bashing Mr Tahau. Kingi joined in, punching Mr Tahau.

Mr Tahau tried to get away, screaming at them "what is the matter? What is your problem?"

At this stage Hamiora stabbed Mr Tahau in the back at least five times while Kingi continued to punch him and hit him with the bat.

Mr Tahau had numerous injuries to his head, body and limbs and died a short time later as a result of a stab wound to his left lung.

Thanks to Nina, my Strange Shet Heppens In New Zealand Correspondent, for the tip!

Save Yourself For Kinky!

You may have read in Saturday's Good Weekend that former leader of The Texas Jewboys, hilarious crime writer and top mate of Wilie Nelson, Kinky Friedman is running as an independent to be the first jewish governor of Texas.

He's doing quite well. According to a Dallas Business Journal poll he's ahead of the nearest candidate by almost 20%.

Exciting stuff.

But I hope he doesn't stop with them gumshoe dick novels because Kinky's such a beautiful writer. Here's a bit I read today during lunch from his 1988 novel, When The Cat's Away.

"Funny the things you think about when your life hangs like a stray gray thread on Ratso's Hadassah Thrift Shop coat. Maybe it continues to cling there and you continue to live. Or maybe some well meaning, neurotic broad puts down her plastic cup of white wine at a SoHo gallery opening and says, 'Just a minute, Ratso, honey, you've got a thread hanging on your coat.' She picks off the thread and you die. The landlord finds a new tenant and raised the rent. The cat goes to the city pound. The girl in the peach-coloured dress calls, hears your voice still on the machine, leaves a message, and wonders why you never got back to her. Serves her right for waiting so damn long to call."

I urge my US readers to contribute to Kinky's campaign fund. Australians aren't allowed to contribute but we can buy a Kinky Talking Action Figure or some bumper stickers from his Campaign Store.

VOTE KINKY!

Tom Waits Interview Footage!

Just found this interview he did on Letterman a couple of years ago when Real Gone came out. I missed it when it first screened and have been told about it second hand by insomniac friends eversince.



And here's an interview he did on the funniest man in the world, Fred Willard's old tonight show, In Fernwood Tonight.

Materazzi, Millane, Pedro And Me

"I love Marco Materazzi. He has Darren Millane's skill and balls, Craig Kelly's niggle and my very own good looks. Actually he does remind me a lot of myself on the football field.

Opposition crowds loved me. They would make interesting observations about my long hair while I would answer by taking out their lairish players, not for a pleasant night of pasta and an Italian short film, but by a late bump or a tad stronger than needed tackle.

My first 'hit' was served in the final round of the under 12's Sydney football season. We, Forest Lions, were up against glamour and money club, St Ives. Can't quite remember his name but I think he was of South American origin (We'll call him Pedro), was cutting us up through the centre. At half time the coach took me aside."

Go to Victoria Park, my Collingwood footy site to find out what happened next. I've also put a video of Marco Materazzi's greatest hits on there to watch.

What Materazzi Said

"An Italian lip-reader last night claimed to have deciphered the words Marco Materazzi said to Zinédine Zidane that provoked the French captain into butting him in the chest during Sunday's World Cup final, the great midfielder's final act before a red card ended his career in top-level football.

According to the BBC, Materazzi said, 'I wish an ugly death to you and all your family,' and then told Zidane to 'go fuck yourself'."

From The Guardian's faultless World Cup coverage.

Others are claiming the brilliantly tattooed Azzuri star told Zidane he was a "dirty terrorist" but Materazzi claims:

"It is absolutely not true, I did not call him a terrorist. I'm ignorant. I don't even know what the word means."

Another theory from The Independent..

It was a confrontation that began with Materazzi grabbing Zidane's shirt.

It is alleged that Zidane responded by sarcastically telling Materazzi that he could have his shirt as a souvenir at the end of the match. The Italian is alleged to have responded by saying that Zidane could keep it for his sister and then made an extremely derogatory comment about her ­ that version is backed up by lip-readers from the Brazilian TV channel Globo. They claim Materazzi called her a "prostitute".

More Trash: This Time It's Millsy

God knows how I found it but Australian Idol bloke, Millsy is travelling the world and blogging about it. I've always liked him. Cocky as all get up.

He hit some mug while doing the Auwssie thing in Germany last week. Here's his account of the fracas and arrest.

I was heading back to eat my dinner after going to the toilets and this dude jumped out at me and starting hugging me and shouting, 'Millsy Millsy, i gotta get a photo, come on i know its you'. So in almost a headlock position, i was confronted with another man, about 200pounds, BIG, and he started asking filthy questions about you know what, and something in me just clicked. Maybe it was because i had seen Sam Newman Punch that guy in the face on the footy show (oh yeah i went to that too, it was awesome) but something clicked and i jabbed the guy in the face and was grabbed by security and asked to leave...

Lucky for me, Nic at the time needed to go to the toilet and she ran to my rescue, explained the situation to the security guards and they let me back in and i ate my meal... shortly after finishing, a policeman came up to our table and asked me to come with him to the station. I was being charged with assault. I could not believe it...

After about thirty minutes in the police station, talking to a couple of aussies who had had their bags stolem, passports and wallets, my fate didnt seem so bad when i was asked to apologise to the man. I did so after he gave me a lecture of how to act when you are in the public eye no matter where you are in the world. Yeah buddy, thanks for that. he deserved it. He was being a tool."

The Turkeygate Footage

I reckon if you clicked this link your computer will start downloading the Big Brother turkey slapping footage.

Stevie Wonder Rocks Out On Sesame Street

This Sesame Street footage of Stevie Wonder performing his own theme for the show has everything. Vocoders, long haired dancing kids, hip band, brown clad and spunky backing singers and a song you'll be singing for the rest of the week.



And here he is in the same session playing an el scorchio version of Superstition. Watch out for the hip as all get up kid on the balcony. He's goes off!

You Tube footage originally found on Daddy Types via on Boing Boing.

Genius Fwoodball Analysis

Andrew Orsatti: How would you compare Croatia's performance over the past three games?

Rale Rasic: I don't care.

And later Les Murray, "The most amazing 90 minutes of my life."

Rex Hunt's Secret Flashin'

Here's the highlights typed straight from my mum's copy of New Idea.

The Rex I'd see in the alleyway was like an excited 13-year-old.

Rex was a perfect gentleman. He would hold my hand, buy me flowers and talk.

"Rex is an exhibitionist," Robyn explains. And she admits he has a kinky side. "Rex was almost caught once about five years ago in a public place naked as a jaybird. A motorist caught him in full force with the headlights of his car. I had on this fluffy leopard print coat and Rex hid behind me and said: "If he asksyou, deny everything!"

As Robyn explains it, she would always be clothed, but Rex would have flung off his clothes by the end of their encounter so he was starkers.

He'd hold her chin so she did not avert her gaze.

"I was to look him straight in the eye and to breathe on him. I would tell him he was wonderful. Then he would work himself to a stae of excitement shouting: "Oh my God, you're going to kill me. You're going to give me a heart attack!"

To my non Australian readers, Rex Hunt is my favorite football commentator known for his ridiculously over the top calling style and his love of fishing.

Happy Morning!!

I don't want The Nightwatchman to degenerate into a tedious funny film clip blog but hey, part oompa loompa, part groundhog day, this ad for Folgers coffee rocks.

If you're into advertising stuff, you can read a little more about this TV ad's disappointing website at American Copywriter.

Nick Barker Is The Wisest Man On Earth

There was a sad bloke who thought he had a problem. He'd heard about a wise guru, Nick Barker of Nick Barker & The Reptiles fame, who had answers to difficult questions.

He decided to find this man.

After a long and difficult journey, he ended up at a temple high upon a mountaintop. I believe it may have been Mount Waverley. He entered and found the guru meditating, listening to some old Replacements records. The guru, sensing the man's presence, opened his eyes and looked up.

Nick Barker: Mate, I see you have a problem.

Man: Yes. That's amazing! How did you know?

Nick Barker: Actually, you have 83 problems.

Man: Well fuck me! It's worse than I thought! 83 problems! What on earth should I do?

Nick Barker: Solve them.

Man: OK… I guess I can work on that. When I solve my 83 problems, then what happens?

Nick Barker: You get 83 more.

Man: What the?!?!?

Nick Barker: Actually, mate. Everyone, every single human being, has 83 problems , from the homeless peasant, to the leader of your country. And actually, some people have 84 problems.

Man: What's the 84th problem?

Nick Barker: The 84th problem is when you believe that you're the only other freak that has 83 problems. This is truly the greatest problem.

Do you have 83 problems? Great. Get your thumb out of your arse and solve them. Do you believe you're the only person that has 83 problems? Then you have 84. Solve that one first, then work on the other 83.

Paraphrased from Human Being Curious via Seth Godin's Blog.

Mmmm. Appetizing!

Mmmm. Appetizing!, originally uploaded by glennpeters.

As seen on the window of a classy establishment in the Box Hill shopping centre.

That's Just Nit Picking

There's nothing more satisfying than a brilliantly written bad movie review. The New Yorker's Anthony Lane's Da Vinci Code Review is an utter polaxing.

Enjoy these bits....

There has been much debate over Dan Brown’s novel ever since it was published, in 2003, but no question has been more contentious than this: if a person of sound mind begins reading the book at ten o’clock in the morning, at what time will he or she come to the realization that it is unmitigated junk?

And...

Meanwhile, art historians can sleep easy once more, while fans of the book, which has finally been exposed for the pompous fraud that it is, will be shaken from their trance. In fact, the sole beneficiaries of the entire fiasco will be members of Opus Dei, some of whom practice mortification of the flesh. From now on, such penance will be simple—no lashings, no spiked cuff around the thigh. Just the price of a movie ticket, and two and a half hours of pain.

Yep, that's right up there with the review Spinal Tap copped for their underrated Shark Sandwich album.

Wise Words From The World's Coolest Little Vegan Man

According to Boing Boing, Prince won a Lifetime Achievement Award at last night's Webby Awards in New York. His five word acceptance speech: "Everything you think is true."

Australia 3 Japan 1: The Video Aftermath

The Japanese government have released this stirring rebuttal to help fans cope with constant ribbing from Australian football hooligans.

Rory Of Chicky And Rory Fame Visits Victoria Park!

It was a bigger thrill than being featured on Cute Overload, the 17th biggest blog on the internet.

An even bigger thrill than the over 1000 visitors this site copped in the 24 hours since.

On Wednesday, Rory the top fella who's become world famous for football training with Chicky, his pet alpaca left a comment on my football site, Victoria Park.

It reads like this,

Rory Matthews said...

hello this is Rory. im glad you like our story.
from Rory

Easily the most special thing to happen in my blogging career.

Happy Birthday To The World's Coolest Little Vegan Man

Prince Rogers Nelson turns 48 today.

A Boy And His Footballing Alpaca

I can't get enough of 8 year old Rory Matthews and Chicky, his footballing alpaca.

Rory's first game against humans since he made front page news was covered on all the channels' TV news last night.

Chicky watched the game from inside the family car parked behind the goalposts. At half time Rory guzzled water from a huge water bottle. Chicky had milk.

When asked what position Chicky would play if he could, Rory matter of factly stated that due to his strong tackling muscle, Chicky would play the backline, somewhere between centre half back and full back.

Strangely Jet, the border collie, Hamlet, the minature pig and Lu Lu the cockatoo were snubbed by television reporters last night.

Earlier this week Rory's dad told The Daily Telegraph:

"Because he's such a small guy, when he first started playing he was too much of a gentleman and would let everyone else get the ball, so I just threw Chicky out there one day when he was kicking because Chicky has an attitude, and it just started from there.

Now Rory is a tackling tiger. He is a fierce tackler on the field now."

Photos from The Daily Telegraph.

The Best Bargain Ever

IMG_0506, originally uploaded by glennpeters.

My mum couldn't resist peeling this price sticker off a pair of shoes at a local shop today. Word is, the shoes weren't even worth the discount price.