While they have the cash to run a candidate in every seat, they don't quite have the talent. Their federal senator, Steve Fielding has struggled with his power in difficult decisions like the recent vote on the new cross media laws. His reasoning behind passing the legislation was widely seen as wishy washy and inept.
The guff on my local candidate, Peter Lake's mail-out and website makes Fielding look impressive. Here's some highlights.
"I am a proud family man and father of three children living in Glen Waverley."So your children live in Glen Waverley but where do YOU live? Doesn't the husband living away from the children contradict your party's definition of family?
"I am honoured to be the FAMILY FIRST Candidate for the seat of Scoresby."Ah, you live down the road in Scoresby! Oh, and "Candidate" isn't a proper noun. Probably a good time for me to link to the party's wishy washy education policy.
Blah blah blah and a few more annoying grammatical errors later, Lake jumps in with his first attempt at a witty politician's turn of phrase....
"I will also be campaigning hard against tolls! Families are paying a high toll in mental health, a high toll in gambling and a high toll in drug use."That hurt my mind. Let's read some of Lake's personal profile.
Proud family man. Married to Fiona with three children - Aged 11, 10 & 7.With 36 mentions of the word "family" on your one page flier, you really didn't need to point out you're a "proud" family man again.
"I am passionate about family values (yawn). While proud of my work, my proudest acievement is my own family, my wife Fiona and my three kids."He repeats the sentiment a few more times and then shoves his fist down our throats and gives our tonsils a good ol' fingering...
"I really believe the heroes of Australia are its mums and dads. They have the toughest job of all: raising children. And they deserve all the help and support they can get."Enough! Tell us what you do for a crust.
26 year career in IT and telecommunications, vast experience in project management, confident public speaker, gifted (tenor) vocalist, published amateur astronomer.Yes, you read it right. Not only is he a "confident public speaker", Peter Lake is a gifted (tenor) vocalist. Hey Peter, you should sing tenor. Ten or twenty miles away!
Look. Politics on all levels is a serious fucking deal. Parliament isn't a place for amateurs and simpletons. Let's keep it that way.
I'll leave you with Lake's resume answer to the question, What experience do I have in politics?
Absolutely none, and I think that's an advantage. I am a service delivery manager and that's what Scoresby families need - better services.And better candidates.