Last Saturday, I was at a top mate's wedding. Priest late. Very late. Nervy groom approaches. "Glenn, could you do me a big favour? The priest's not going to show up. Reckon you could you marry us?"
"Um. Yeah, why not. You got vows?"
"Nah, I'm sure you can make some up."
"Sure. Give me five minutes. Got a pen?"
So I'm up there with the groom. Ready to go. The bride's about to come in to a nice old Stems song. Family from all over the country. Friends. Lots of people. All in suits. This is a real wedding folks.
You know how I got the pen? I wrote nothing on that bit of paper.
Bride coming and in RUNS the priest.
Nobody said nothing. I politely step off the stage.
I did hear a "Thank Christ!" but the more I think about it, it was probably me.
Both bride and groom enjoyed the ceremony but were pissed the priest actually showed up to do his job.
I still don't know what their vows would have been if I had've done it.