Here we go. It's Dane Swan's night. Ball magnet with lots of tatts. Every year I put money on him to win or place and every year I lose my cash. They've singled him out for his own entry onto stage with Gary Garry Ablett. JINX. Who could forget when they talked up Luke Darcy crazy like a few weeks ago. He barely got a vote.
The world was embarrassed.
Almost as embarrassed as we're going to be for the rest of our lives for when Edelsten's broad walks in with her breasts akimbo.
Steve Quarterbrain is hosting. That's going to be entertaining for youse reading this because I don't like him much. Not much at all.
Did I watch the "Blue Carpet"? No, it was boring because Footy's Night Of Nights isn't about the bad dresses and tits. It's about the players. It's about Dane Swan. I hope.